Spiderman 3

[skull_bearer]

Dear Parker: Die. Just die. And take your stupid Hitler-hair with you. Die and come back as a zombie because that's the closest you'll ever get to Goth you stupid little person.
Actually, that would have been pretty cool. Zombifying characters is so totally the way to save a crap film. Go zombies!

And on that subject...

Dear Venom: You are cool. Cool as a very cool thing, though I dispute the wisdom of binding to Parker. You shoudl have stuck to the motorbike. We both know the real reason you unbound from him, he didn't force you out, you ran away in disgust. I totally relate. I want your teeth.

Dear Person-Venom-Posessed: Going to a church and praying to a man dying on a cross to kill the guy who got you fired is so not cool. I'd tell you to get a life, but... you kinda did, didn't you? Venom rocks. You also have cool teeth.

Dear Sandman: If you want to be seen as a sympathetic charcter who only wants to save his sick daughter, don't kill so many people. Sneak into a bank at night (I doubt even safes are airtight) and take all the money. Hell, do it in daylight! They couldn't stop you then either. Drop it on your ex-wife's doorstep and voila! End of trouble. If Parker tries to stop you, hey, you're only doing this to help your kid, and you didn't hurt anyone! Moral high ground.

Dear Mary-Jane: Your romance with Parker was actually believable, and while I dispute the wisom of staying with him when there are sweethearts like Harry Osborn in the offering.

Dear Gwen Stacy: You were a bit 'pasted on yay!' and rather too blond, but you walked out on Parker when he was being an arsehat and behaved like a very nice person, so I like you. It's nice when directors managed to make characters properly likeable *huggles the only bit of subtlety in this film*.

Dear Harry Osborn: I love you. Seriously. Your storyarc was the only one I was really invested it, it worked, which is more than I can say for a lot of the others. I think it's because Parker was only peripherally involved. I want your goblin helmet, although your dad still rules with his surfboard. You should so not have died.

Dear Aunt May: I hate it when people try to emotionally manipulate me with so little subtlety. Die and take your storyline with you.

Dear subtlety: Where the hell were you? Did someone hit the director with the 'stupidity' mallet after the second film?

Dear Skull Bearer: *bleaches brain to forget Parker's psudo-goth-hollywood-emo-boyband moment* Gnaaaa.... *huggles Harry, and Venom, and zombies*

Skull Bearer.

Comments

[shadowvalkyrie.livejournal.com]

Zombifying characters is so totally the way to save a crap film. Go zombies!
I'll remember that for writing.

Venom, I want your teeth.
Cool, but probably totally impractical. Especially during sex. Urgh.

Sandman... You have a point.

Gwen Stacy... Yes, I was surprised I liked her, too.

Harry... You should so not have died. Right. And the worst thing: He wouldn't have had to, if MJ had just called an ambulance instead of sitting there and watching him die for at least ten minutes. Well, his own fault, I suppose, he asked her to. (But then... Yes, listen to the injured boy, MJ, he's totally in charge of the situation.) For some reason it kept me amused for the entire ending. *has evil sense of humour*

And I know it totally wasn't the sense behind the movie, but the obnly moment I really cheered for Peter was when he was under the influence of his "evil" side and kicked his asshole colleague out. That was about the ONLY time in his entire life when he showed something like a backbone. On the other hand, hitting his girlfriend and throwing grenades at his best friend wasn't such a grand idea, I give the producers that, but it wasn't actually /evil/, either, just over-reacting.
Anyway, I don't like Peter Parker (except I did when I was a small kid and and loved the cartoon series to pieces) and even less the actor who plays him (my anti-type of an ideal man, probably *shudder*) and only went for along for Kris's sake, because she adores him. The chance of getting her out of depression for a day was worth it.
I only wished the producers might have put their marriage issues elsewhere. *yawn*

[dried-frog-pill.livejournal.com]

Parker needed to jump off a building or something. One of the times when he was contemplating using the black spidey-suit (before the whole bridge scene) pne of the people I was with laughed and said "He's gonna go listen to Linkin Park, slit his wrists and write emo poetry, that's what he's gonna do now." Such a stupid decision on the director/screenwriter's part. You want to show he's depressed/rebelling, but did they have to make him emo-lite? D8<

WHY DID VENOM SEEM TO GET SO LITTLE SCREENTIME. D8< SRSLY I could have done without the whole bad "dancing" and stupid hair-cut on Peter's part if it meant more Venom. The fights were seriously the best part of the movie.

And I hated his whole relationship with Mary Jane, but that may be because I don't like Mary Jane all that much XD And I was surprised how much I did like Gwen. Word on Aunt May. Every time she showed up I wanted to bash my head against the seat in front of me.

[greek-minx.livejournal.com]

Laugh so you don't cry, dear.

Be amused at seeing what an emo kid would have done had he gone to prom (Jazz Room aka Peter's-being-a-douche scene).

Alas, I agree. Silly Spiderman 3.