skull_bearer: (Default)
skull_bearer ([personal profile] skull_bearer) wrote2011-07-16 09:00 pm
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Potterdammerung the Movie

Points:

- There is only so much you can do with a book that got me so pig-biting mad I threw it against the wall so hard the binding split.

- That being said, what they did was pretty damn good

- I was wincing every time a Book!line came in (particularly the scene where the Slytherins were sent out, I was hoping they'd leave that out).

- Harry, go on, give him a kiss. I knew I couldn't have been the only one thinking that. Inbeforenoncon. When you broke the Elder Wand, I agreed with the tossers behind me that "That's why I was rooting for Voldemort." Amen you arseholes.

-Other trio were... trio. Boring, mundane, slightly less stupid than usual and generally made me wish we could have Voldemort!Cam more often.

- Everyone else was... everyone else. Deaths Eaters were very awesome, everyone else was fail. The wrong side won. The End.

- Filmmakers made up for a crap script by forcing in as many visuals as possible. Battle for Hogwarts was AMAZING on all sides, Death Eaters were in their thousands, DEMENTORS, and Harry and Voldemort had a massively homo-erotic fight before the stupid back-firing wand deus ex which could have been dispensed with entirely as it was shown (and very well too) that loosing the Horcruxes were weaking Voldemort and he wasn't thinking to sharp by the end.

- Dumbledore WHY CAN'T YOU STAY DEAD Stupid evil vicious fucker I hate you and die. *beats old coot to death, stomps on the remains and purges the ground with fire and salt* The dead baby sketch was as creepy and vile as in the book, which isn't a complement BTW. It's a fucking dying baby and you left it there to die.

- Why the fuck was the Gringotts security guard wearing a nazi beltbuckle? And an SA uniform in blue? Inquiring minds want to know, and violent sticks have an appointment with your head. Godwin's law, you have lost the argument.

Dragon was awesome, Gringotts (other than Godwin's fail) was awesome. Goblins made me double take because they'd walzed right out of Der Sturmer. UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT.

- Other uncomfortable moment, anyone else notice that the Death Eaters counted a lot of PoC in their midst, as well as all the disanfranchised Giants and werewolves etc? While the only noticeable non-white person on the good side was Dean Thomas (who had no lines either). Goyle was made black as well for some reason. I don't know if it's deliberate but it's FUCKING CREEPY. Anti-racist tract this is NOT.

- Voldemort was... gah. Love you. Love you. Always loved you. Would marry you if I didn't want to be you so badly. Awesome awesome awesome. I downed an 18 year old bottle of Glenfiddich when you finally had it, old friend. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to blank out THAT FUCKING EPILOGUE.

- You know what I said at the beginning? That they're only so much you can do with this shit? Yeah. The Epilogue. Sow's ear, silk purse. Fail.

- When Harry got hit by the killing curse, I went, yup, movie over, and pretended to get ready to leave. Wish I had. Would have saved me from THAT FUCKING EPILOGUE!

-Finally, an euology to a character I've been so close to they feel like an old friend:


[identity profile] underlankers.livejournal.com 2011-07-16 08:14 pm (UTC)(link)
It's also rather ironic, speaking of multi-racial Dark Lord armies that Sauron's army has humans, Orcs, Trolls, immortals......and Morgoth's was even more diverse. It does have a few Unfortunate Implications. I might note that I was also Rooting For the Empire, because I consider the entire HP Wizarding World a house of cards that needs the right wind and it would all fall down. And unfortunately the good guys, given their penchant to brainwashing and lighter and softer speciesism don't seem all that good to me.

[identity profile] skull-bearer.livejournal.com 2011-07-16 08:26 pm (UTC)(link)
This was not an any planet a happy ending. It was creepy, and warped, and reinforced a rotten status quo. ALL IS NOT FUCKING WELL YOU SCARFACED DIPSHIT.

[identity profile] underlankers.livejournal.com 2011-07-16 08:27 pm (UTC)(link)
I agree with you. It didn't help that Ralph Fiennes made an awesome movie!Voldemort.

[identity profile] skull-bearer.livejournal.com 2011-07-16 08:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Actually, Voldemort is one character I've always had a clear image of, and Fiennes isn't really it.

[identity profile] soldurios.livejournal.com 2011-07-16 08:27 pm (UTC)(link)
I liked Voldemort's death because he didn't really die. He just returned to the darkness from whence he came. Really, no body, no death. Rule of fiction.

And good Dark Lords know when to return.

As for the dying baby...