I guess I told you before, but I'd rather leave out the "Shalafi" lines in the chapter before last, because somehow it just doesn't fit with their relationship at that point. And you should (maybe) take away the last chapter and put into 'Ice and Steel', so all the things to be filed under 'Arrival in Solace' are collected there, while only the actual journey happens in 'Enigma', though I suppose such a severe change would destroy your basic concept a bit. On grammar/typos/punctuation, I'm labouring a lot myself, so I can't offer much help there, but it seems you already found someone for it anyway. Right up there! ":-D
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regna
(no subject)
Date: 2006-10-06 10:49 am (UTC)And you should (maybe) take away the last chapter and put into 'Ice and Steel', so all the things to be filed under 'Arrival in Solace' are collected there, while only the actual journey happens in 'Enigma', though I suppose such a severe change would destroy your basic concept a bit.
On grammar/typos/punctuation, I'm labouring a lot myself, so I can't offer much help there, but it seems you already found someone for it anyway. Right up there! ":-D